helpgirl505 is Socorro's SpaceHey blog, found from the description of Kami's videos on YouTube[1]. Their blog provides backstory for what happened to their mental state and gives implications to Bento's fate, as well as providing extra context to Fundação Mariposa[2] and introducing Lilian Paiva[3].
The blog posts are recreated here from oldest to newest for conveniencey's sake, but you can also read them newest to oldest here. Please read from left to right. Anything between brackets [] is added on by the webmaster for context. Text that is colored white was hidden in the original blog post.
heyo. as you probably saw in my profile, i'm a college student new here in spacehey. i really like browsing around tech forums so i'm hoping to find like minded people here. shoot me a private message :P sometimes i get busy but i do try to reply.
i keep getting asked about my name. lol. you see, it's my actual name in portuguese. i have always found it funny how it's used as a normal name, though i have had to hear so many of the same jokes about it that it's not really funny anymore :P. oh, when people call me loudly it always sounds like they are in trouble.
i have finally gotten myself a job! it helps ends meet while i'm still in college. not the best, though - it's a tool booth job, in the middle of a road. AND it's a night shift, since i study in the afternoon. goodbye sleep :P. but i'm accepting any job right now since i'm struggling to buy food and basic stuff...
maybe it's not as bad as i'm making it in my head, we'll see. if i can do sudoku inside my booth, i'll be just fine.
hello again. one of my coworkers was talking to me about how she was planning to get a camera for herself but didn't know if this was any good and i said i'd get back to her from my techy-blogy stuff. is this good for videoing? i know it's the lastest on kodak casual cameras, but i don't have one to check it for myself. cheers
hey. i'm finally on vacation due to the incoming holidays. things have not been easy. i was able to get into a great public college but as the semesters go by i feel more and more out of place - i notice people looking down on me with such comtempt. you see, i come from the favelas ...
[click to expand]
... i don't have a pretty, important job, and to top it off i guess i come off a bit anti-social. they don't say anything stupidoutloud but they don't really have to... i know what they are thinking when they don't pick me for any group projects. and giggle amongst themselves.
sorry i struggle to make enough to have food on the table and money for the subway every week, i guess. i hate everyone.
well, almost everyone. i have been treated quite well by my coworkers - they are also both introverts so they don't talk a lot, which is great because i hate talkative people. funny how a smelly booth in the middle of the imigrantes has become my refuge.
but hey, happy holidays anyway.
[Socorro writes about an event on January 3rd where Lilian Paiva[4] and two other victims died, the former the murderer of the two victims. Read the full entry here.]
hey. it's been a while since i've posted anything now, but i felt like this was worth a blog entry.
you see, i have never really remembered my dreams until very recently. for the past 3 weeks or so i've been having this recurrent dream that i have no idea what could mean, and whenever i have it i wake up ...
[click to expand]
... exhausted, it's like i didn't sleep at all. it's always the same: i wake up on a mountain of trash, like some kind of a wasteland or a scrapyard. then i look up and there are red moths flying all around me. i look to the right and there is a black cat that never faces me, then to the left, and there's nothing. i can't really move, i just lay down on the trash and look up to all the moths in the purple sky until they start to swarm me and then i always wake up. they're loud and i can feel all their wings brushing against my skin, it's not very pleasant.
i want to stop having this dream, it's getting really irritating. i told my coworker about it and she got completely horrified, because she hates bugs. i don't really hate bugs, but i'm starting to.
the weirdest part though, is that i told my other coworker about it and he said to have been seeing a black cat in his dreams, too. is it just coincidence? i wonder.
i'm definetly not known for my artistic abilities but here is a doodle of what i see. i tried.
LITTLE DID SOCORRO KNOW, THIS WAS THE BEGGINING OF THEIR CERTAIN AND RAPID DOWNFALL.
hey. i appreciate everyone who tried to look into this further with me. appearantly, the police concluded lilian has died from a stroke right after committing both murders.
this is beyond strange. was it truly lilian who killed them, then? did the stress somehow induce the ...
[click to expand]
... stroke? and what about that note? i tried comparing that face-like doodle to any occult type symbols and it's no match. let's continue to look into this. i really think there is something larger at play here.
hello. it's me. i've had a really strange night yesterday. [click to expand] dressed in black shirts. the driver gave me the money, staring at me intensily the whole time as i went to put it into the register. as i opened up the gate from them, i took a better look at the passenger and he was very....strange. he had a weird dotted line tattoo across his neck and seemed to be almost in a trance like state; i'm sure i didn't see him blink for the whole interaction. then the driver takes a final look at me and says:
i don't remember if i've mentioned it, but i work the night shift at a tool booth.
well, all was normal enough yesterday until a car with blacked out windows rolled along. as the window rolled down, there were two men inside, both ...
"you look like someone troubled. we can help. we are here."
he then took a business card out of his pocket and handed it to me, rolled the window back up and drove away.
this creeped me out like no other. just take a look at this card:
come to the light. huh. this is some cult-like shit.
the contact info at the back seemed to have been scraped off though, which left me clueless on what to do with this. has anyone had any similar encounters? am i just being messed with? :P please, let me know.
ENJOY YOUR WITS WHILE THEY LAST, SOCORRO.
[Socorro shares more pictures of the Fundação Mariposa logos they found around the road. Read the full entry here.]
hey. it's been a while. i've been thinking about many things recently, and trying to put them all together - there is just so much weirdness going on around me. the murders, the cult, and now my coworker has started seeing things. can you develop schizophrenia at 23 years old? i don't know what is going on with him. ...
[click to expand]
he's been quieter than usual and staring at the walls and ceilings more than at us when we are speaking. oh, also, the cat that appears in our dreams has started showing up in his hallucinations too, appearantly.
we don't know what to do. his girlfriend as well as me and my coworker have advised he sees a therapist but he insists he's just fine.
i'm still not sure if this is connected to everything else, and it's much harder when i'm not taken seriously by anyone i talk about this with. i already got the "crazy conspiracist" fame.
i'll keep you updated.
WILL YOU, SOCORRO?
hey. i think my tech friends on here might have already heard of twitter. i don't have an account myself, but my friend does and it seems weird. she showed me something about traumacore and cottagecore and some more cores which i don't really get, and from what i read from her computer, they seem to have ...
[click to expand] ... strange slangs like ratio and oomf, and the interface is unlike anything i've ever seen, it feels really modern and minimalistic. i don't feel the need to open an account because that just seems like way too much for me, but she seems to be having fun even though she says it's actually really hard to talk to anyone there and they all seem to ignore her.
these new social medias are really wild. i think i'm much more fan of youtube.
hey. something happened three days ago. it seems like i had a seizure, from what i was told. i was in college when suddenly i started to feel a strong headache, and i don't remember much after that, but i woke up in the emergency room. i haven't been told the causes yet but it wasn't a very pleasant experience, it was very ...
[click to expand]
... scary, in fact. i'm really hoping it's just a one time thing and not indicative of a more serious issue. i was also told i hit my hand on a chair while convulsing and it still hurts quite a bit.
hey. i've strated to believe that maybe, just maybe, what my cowroker sees in his visions is real. i maen, i have seen the blakc cat he taskl about so much. i saw it crosing the road. maybe i wad wring about him being crazy. i wanted to tske a picture of it but ie ran away before i could. mayybe it doesn't liek photos.
hello my dearest diary,
i feel wierd. like there is something going on mmy brains. i just feel like someting is not rigt but i don't know what it is. i try nott to think about it too mucj. it hurts my brainsd to think.
maybe i'm juts hungry im gonna get a bread.
i'm bac i got a bread to eat bevause i'm hungry.
if any1 wants a bite let me kmow TECH friend s
todaloo
DEAREST DIARY
i know. more abot the cult or whstevevr. I WAS lookikng at a. butterflu and it flew inside of s trasdcan and. and nlooked like jthe ones i liek when they TOUCHme. i liek it. i dug nto the trashcan AND. i brougghgt it to ...
[click to expand]
... kami. cus she likrs bugs. i dsaid. HELLO freind meet my new fRIED ALFRED. THE BUTTERFLY. anf sje screamed bevacuse she was so excITED. so i scteamed with h er cos i waS excied to.
any way th at is not the POINT. the BUTTEFFLY whwispehr to med whem we were aling togeter anf it tols me whete it came frOM. and jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj sorru ii gorgot i has my finger on that key and it told me. it likes MURDER. i am neurtal on murder.
i oput it in a pot asnd i think its sleepong now i'm so glad i habe a NEW FRIEND ALFERD. bento REALLY SLIKES him too.thanls tech friendsssssss
[the above emojis, when translated to morse code, spell S O S.]
DEAREST DIARY.
i have LOST. my tube username i cant find it.
i used keep it in my. BOOTH im a paper but I CAN'T FIFND it anynmore. can anyone HELP ME?
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DOES ANYONE KNOW WHERE MY TUBE IS??????????
WHERE IS MY TUBE
WEF
i likrffffffk it and now its goneeee :((((((((((((((((( and now id i want to cry im going to cru :((((((((((
thank you kindly
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
IT'S TRULY AMAZING TO SEE HOW MUCH YOU'VE DETERIORATED IN SUCH A SHORT PERIOD OF TIME. YOU USED TO BE A FORCE, SOCORRO. NOW YOU'RE JUST COMIC RELIEF.
god.
i just had a second seizure yesterday night and woke up on the floor of my bedroom with foam dripping from my mouth. it felt like waking up from a long strange dream, i just took a look at my blog and i don't have memories of writing half of these. i'm still ...
[click to expand]
... getting my bearings. this is bad. it's really bad. i don't know what is real half the time and i'm having so much trouble thinking straight. i don't know what to do, it's like i can feel myself slowly slipping away. i don't know how much this clarity of mind i have right now will last, when will i go back to spilling nonsense again.
i just don't ķnow what to do. i'm sorry. i'm actually going insane and i can't do anything to stop it.
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[Socorro shares some edits they made of them and their friends. Read the full entry here.]
DEAR DIARYi have falen in LOVE. i know now. what love feels like
i do i met THE ONE. irt's RICARDO.
HE'S VERY SEXY AND SMELLS GRAT. like plastic.. very guod plastic
i want to have a family qwith him and I KNOW he loves me back <3 <3 <3 <3 3,3,33, 3,<
don't get jealous..i know we are PERFECT and it's hard not to bnut jealousyd makes you a soggy bun.
ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp